The One Where I am Free (29 / 365)

Cue up Lee Greenwood and get his ass out here singing

Cue up Lee Greenwood and get his ass out here singing

Yes, today is America’s “Birthday” in so much that Christmas is Jesus’ “Birthday”.  Today is not a day to complain about the government or the system or how bad America has fallen; you come into my house on my birthday and start talking shit, i kick you out.

This post is not so much about weight loss or motivation, but rather to give thanks that we live in a country that it is OK to drive you car to the gym to get on a stationary bike, or a treadmill.  It is OK to think that a Diet Coke offsets the 1200 calorie burger and fries.  We are proud in america because we built this country (after we stole it, I guess, twice) with our own damn hands and we should be proud, but we also need to remember what it is about to be humble, the scrappy underdog, and get some of that mojo back so people around the world will love us again.

I am talking to you sir, there is no need to go to France wearing your American and Proud hat, shirt and coat.  Bring it down a notch and maybe you won’t think the French are that snooty (like you told me last time you were there); I happen to love the French.

Here is a list of 6 things I thought of this morning that I love about America:

1) Baseball – Especially the Cubs.  Any other sport without a championship in 115 years would have been sold, but not the Cubbies – They represent all that is American Underdoggedness.
2) Buffets – Come on, I know I am working on losing weight but a buffet is a thing of beauty.  Let’s say I want an eggroll, fried chicken, a taco and a doughnut without making four stops?  Perfect.
3) National and State Parks – Wow, I love the outdoors and can’t weight (see what I did there?) to lose a little more and the heat to come down so I can explore places like Arches, Zion, Grand Canyon (the ones in my back yard to start).
4) Multiple Cultures – Look, I am not for ILLEGAL immigration, but those that are really against it seem to be all about the timing of it, right?  But legal immigration is awesome.  We are a melting pot, we are so much better for having friends from all over th globe to teach us their culture, food, loves and ethos.
5) 7-11 – I think it is still owned by an Pac-Asian company, but having worked there and shopped there for years, I still remember to this day as a youth when 7-11 closed on Christmas and Thanksgiving, but no more.  Make sure to thank those who work there on those days, especially Christmas when you realize you forgot four double “A” batteries and go to buy them for $8.79
6) Music – of ALL kinds, except dubstep.  We are a musical frakking culture.  I love Rock and Roll, We built this city on rock and roll, rock and roll hoochie coo.  I love guitar, DJ, and wailing lyrics man, I am frutie for the music.  Every culture has their own, but see point 4 above, we have taken music from other cultures and made it our own.  I mean Ravi Shankar?  I loved him and his daughter and then be able to go listen to Ted Nugent in the same breath.  Wow.

So Bless us today on our national holiday; go get a quick workout in, or hell, a long hike.  Then spend the day with loved ones – find them, anywhere, and share what you love about today.  I plan on family,a  beer or two, burgers and sparklers (and my wife dancing around like a pixie with her camera getting the shot, she has been thinking and planning this for days).  Namaste.


The One Where I Feel Upside Down (19 / 365)

This angle really brings out the grey

This angle really brings out the grey

One of the first things I notice is that when I shoot with my wife’s more professional camera with her new 50mm fixed lens, she gets kind of antsy as if I am going to break it.  pshaw.  Second, I come in a lot more in focus.

A lot more in focus, great metaphor for today.  I am feeling very upside down like this picture implies and I am having a hard time communicating this to anyone, especially my wife, I am coming off like a whiny li’l bitch.  I am not a great orator anyway, and when I am trying to talk about the lack of clarity or issues circling my brain, I stammer, I go emotions and I do not get it out.

Basically though, what I think I am trying to tell everyone is that right now I feel out of focus and I need to get the picture sharper.  Working out will definitely help, but I have some major blurred shots in my career and living.  I am going to need some time to focus through that and answer some very tough questions (Is C1B as dedicated to me as I to it, and if not, what do I do?  Do I want to stay in Las Vegas and is my wife committed or is it lip service?)

So please, if you read this and know me in my day-to-day, I am just seeking clarity, like everyone else and not trying to be a douche.



The One Where I say “Enough Planning” (13 / 365)

Ohhhhhh, Spooky

Ohhhhhh, Spooky

So, they planned on building a big ass boat that couldn’t be sunk.  They also planned on conquering the Russian front in winter.  They also planned on opening their dream coffee house in Downtown Las Vegas ahead of the coming boom.  This is a picture of me planning my 2014 Sprint Tri Training Run.  BUT, like the other plans, they are only words on a paper unless I get up tomorrow at 5:30, get to the gym for my daily AM cardio.

Visualize the gym, the bike, the ride, the sweat, the pain, the desire to stop cause your fat, the enemy creeping up your ass telling you you aren’t good enough.   Visualize you kicking the enemy in the balls and going for 5 more minutes, because you are a bad ass and stronger than your fat.  Imagine the stretching in the sauna, how your muscles will soften and stretch and feel so good.

Visualize you being stronger than you were when you entered the gym, and you fucking know it.  Allez Mike, Allez.

You can do it too, you are a bad ass, and stronger than you ever thought possible.  Tell me how it goes tomorrow, motivate my fat ass.  Namaste.

The Have and the Have Not Knot

A fellow blogger of mine and I must be on the same wavelength, Awesome Ashilde (sorry my friend, I do not know how to add the diactric 😦 ), posted about the power of positive thinking and visioning called “What Can the Power of Your Mind Do?“;  Take a few moments and go check out her blog and then come back to this one.  Pretty awesome stuff eh?  Pretty bad pun there  forgive me.

For the past few weeks, since the end of May, I had been trying to figure out why I was not getting anywhere with my weight loss journey.  I was about to start my Weightloss 365 project, I was a member of Gym-Pact and going to the gym at least 4 times a week but still not losing, and in fact, I had gained a couple more.  Looking back, we were still not key on the food side and that was a big part of it, but an even bigger part goes back over 16 months now.  Probably to October 2011.

That was the month I stopped seeing me as a triathlete, a runner, a climber, a hiker or fitness rat.  Instead my vision changed to that of husband and father at 40.  And it scared me, it brought me a lot of stress, fear, doubt and anger at times.  Of COURSE this was in addition to all of the love, happiness, gladness, excitement and hope that overwhelmed the others like 4 to 1, but it was still a seed and my vision plan of Mike fell to the side.

When you are planning something big you simply cannot get off plan.  I had gotten just over halfway to my goal weight in a little over 1 year.  I had lost over 120 pounds in 13 months, that is freaking huge and I had so much more on my plate but decided I could focus on myself less and less and focus on the other roles first.

When we see professional athletes or musicians that are literally at the top of their game, what do we think?  sometimes we think arrogance and ego and we would not be wrong.  There is so much work to be the best at your game that you have to put yourself first and for right or wrong, sometimes that causes these men and women to make bad choices and cheat at their sport, or in their personal life.  But at the core of what they were doing, putting themselves and their game first, was absolutely correct.

Let me ask you a question, if you are out of shape and not taking care of yourself before ALL other things, how are you going to be around to take care of everything else?  You won’t be.

That was what I had forgotten, before my wonderful marriage and baby with Amanda it was easy, I was alone and could and would put my needs above all others.  I still have to, just tempered down a notch and I have to remember it’s not going to be as easy as it was before.  But I still can do it.  I don’t blame anyone or expect anyone sympathy for my loss of vision, that is what vision is, it belongs to the owner so nobody can take it away.  I alone lost it.

Think about Christian prayer, Wiccan spellcasting, pre-game drills and rituals, rally caps.  What do all of these have in common?  They are all part of the vision process and allow us to creatively see what we want, focus energy on it and make it happen, and believe me when I say i have cast a few spells and got EXACTLY what i wanted even though maybe I wasn’t 100% on target to what i wanted.

By seeing myself as a triathlete in making, a hiker and climber, I had  become these things.  I was riding my bike everywhere, I had taken up running and was looking for a swim team to learn to swim.  I was hiking at least every few weeks, both urban and nature, and was well on my way to climbing by the end of 2012.  Then my vision changed as I mentioned and I saw myself as father, husband and breadwinner.  I have to incorporate my earlier vision into my current vision.

To make this long post come to a close, last week I began to see myself as father, husband, breadwinner, triathlete in making, climber, hiker, and cheerleader for my kids and family and continue to use POSITIVE voice instead of NEGATIVE voice, I have made some folks smile, made a new friend or two and weight wise have lost over 5 pounds this week.  That is amazing and part of my vision.  The most awesome thing about this, is that creative visioning is self-perpetuating.

What do I mean?  The more I see myself in the way I want to be seen, the easier it is to meet my short to intermediate goals and when I meet those goals, it is easier to see myself in the way I want to be seen and so on.  Amazing!  It works.

So for this week I challenge YOU to post one positive thing in social media, to workout at least three times this week and more importantly, come up with one positive light to see yourself in this week and make it happen.  I KNOW you can do this, I can see it in you.

Before I forget to all those who are fathers or “fathers” or fathers to be, happiest of all fathers day to you.  It is the unsung hero of our generation who makes his kids feel like they can achieve anything.


The One Were I am Amazed (10 / 365)

Chilling after a 10:15 PM workout, cause sometimes that is what it takes (Work)

Chilling after a 10:15 PM workout, cause sometimes that is what it takes (Work)

My wife hates it when I thug up my pic, but I can’t help it, I am a four digit hustler, trying to make racks and stacks, all while swinging new jacks and stuff.  Actually, if you want to see what my life is like, this post over at an up and coming photographer’s website really captures two of the most important things to me, be careful, it is so gangster.

On a serious note, I am amazed and thankful and a little apologetic.  I have a theme for this blog and it is inspiration and motivation and documenting ME to truly learn to appreciate myself through mini posts about my day, with some longer posts spread in for good note on some days (One in the works for tomorrow), I call this my WeightLoss 365:  Sometimes Fitness isn’t Pretty.  Yesterday’s post, 9/365, i actually pulled off of FB, but left on WP for better or worse.  i was trying to be funny, but kind of went the other way from inspiring.  i stand by my work as a whole, so I left it up here, but after re-reading it, I sounded kind of pervey and juvenile.  And that is not the theme of this blog.

Why I am amazed is that after 7 days of working on myself mentally, not eating out and giving a meh effort in the gym (meaning this week I would rate on a 6 / 10 for overall good ness, where before it was a 2 or 3), I have lost 5.6 pounds.  I am amazed and thankfull to my friends and my wife and kids who are letting me learn to put myself at the front again.  You effing rock.


The one in the Swimming Pool (3/365)

I had all these amazing ideas lined up.  I had my wife take a picture of me floating in the pool, backlit with the pool lights glowing angelic around my head as a halo, thus showing my beatific side.  My readers would look upon the image and say unto my blog that they accepted me as their personal weight-loss guru.

Well, like I said, sometimes weight-loss is not a pretty thing and my Android took a pretty crappy picture, I cannot blame Amanda, we are only as good as the tools we use.  Needless to say, I went with the creepy first shot I took; I played with it a little on Pic Monkey.  The pool session went a little rough, I wore the wrong shorts, and they kept falling off.  NOBODY needs to see that picture, so instead I floated and played with the baby for an hour.

Hopefully, these pictures start to mean something to you as much as they do to me.  I have 362 to go and I insist that though some may be of me just waking up on the toilet, others are going to be amazeballs.  I already have 365 planned, but I cannot tell you!

Saturday is wrapping up, my wife got some alone time downtown taking pictures of graffiti and being yelled at by Cindy Funkhouser, the crazy tart that runs the amazing Funk House (too bad she is insane, her store is awesome and should be seen)***.  Speaking of things to see in Vegas, if you are coming here and want to have an beast of an off the grid experience, message me and you will not be disappointed.  For now, I rest, and get ready for the bike tomorrow.  Namaste.

I will be a triathlete and the swim part is my biggest fear

I will be a triathlete and the swim part is my biggest fear

*** I am not a clinician and cannot speak to the medical state of Cindy Funkhouser, but seriously, she was watching Amanda take pictures and harassing her and she once charge me 2.00 for a bag to carry shit I bought from her store.  She is like the old man yelling at kids to get off his damn lawn.  This is parody and my opinion.